In a world that usually calls for prompt success, the place we really feel the strain to have all of it discovered in our careers, relationships, motherhood, and private development it’s straightforward to really feel like we’re falling behind. However what if we shifted our perspective? What if, as an alternative of seeing setbacks as failures, we embraced them as steps alongside our journey? That’s the place the Energy of But is available in.
What Is the Energy of But?
The idea of Not But comes from psychologist Carol Dweck’s groundbreaking work on the development mindset. I lately heard her talking in regards to the Energy of But in her well-known TED Talk, she shared a narrative a couple of Chicago highschool that changed failing grades with the phrase “Not But.” As a substitute of feeling like they’d hit a lifeless finish, college students felt motivated to maintain going, realizing that success was nonetheless inside attain.
It bought me into pondering this straightforward but highly effective shift in mindset may be a game-changer for girls of their private {and professional} lives. Whether or not it’s pursuing a dream job, therapeutic from a previous relationship, or discovering stability as a mom, Not But reminds us that development is a course of not a race.

How ‘Not But’ Is a Development Mindset for Girls
1. It Reframes Failure/Pauses as Development
As ladies, we are sometimes taught to concern failure to keep away from dangers, to be good, and to have every little thing below management. However Not But permits us to see challenges as alternatives to develop reasonably than causes to give up. As a substitute of claiming, “I failed at this,” we are saying, “I haven’t mastered it but.” or “I’m engaged on it”
Affirmation – Subsequent time you’re feeling like giving up, remind your self: I’m studying. I’m rising. I’m on my approach.
2. It Helps in Practising Self-Compassion
Motherhood is stuffed with Not But moments. Perhaps you’re nonetheless determining the best way to stability work and parenting, or the best way to carve out time for your self with out guilt. As a substitute of feeling such as you’re not doing sufficient, remind your self that you just’re a piece in progress identical to your kids.
Affirmation – I’m not failing, I’m studying and evolving.
3. It Helps Profession & Entrepreneurial Development
Dreaming of launching a enterprise? Making an attempt to land that management position? Feeling caught in your profession? Not But encourages us to maintain pushing ahead. The doorways we knock on right now might not open instantly, however that doesn’t imply they by no means will.
Affirmation – Each setback is a setup for a comeback. I’ll carry on preserving on!
Embracing ‘Not But’ in On a regular basis Life
You aren’t behind. You aren’t failing. You’re precisely the place that you must be studying, rising, and turning into. The subsequent time you’re feeling caught, remind your self: Not But will not be a No. It’s a Not Now. Your time is coming. Hold going. You haven’t figured it out but, however you’ll.
Able to discover extra self-growth? Try these associated posts on Sanity Day by day:
What’s your ‘Not But’ second?
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